Fuck me, a talking armadillo

Apparently there's a pole dancer called Terri Hosford.

What a bitch.

That hoe means that any fantastic hu(man) being looking for my epic musings on such resources as Google, Yahoo or StrippersDatabaseCentral, will instead find pictures of some bullshit stripper with a man's name and genitals.

I'm gonna stab that bitch.

And not with my penis like a Chaston.

"Woolmer said it was South Africa's finest fielding display so far. ``It's the best since I have been in charge,'' he said. ``It was close to awesome.''

That quote was in relation to the 1996 World Cup. Obviously can't be recent as that guy is close to dead.

Trent Barrett has been picked to play as part of our fresh young new Origin team. Here's a picture of Trent Barrett looking like a douche.


Here's another picture of Trent Barrett in his natural environment.


Man i hate Trent Barrett.

The newsreaders keep saying "31 year old Trent Barrett has been given an origin recal' to emphasize his age as the exasperating factor in his selection. It makes me angry coz age is irrelevant. Anyone of that age or beyond could easily perform at that level. What people should be emphasizing is that "huge giant douche Trent Barrett has been picked for an origin recall."

'BAH AWAY FUCK YOUR ADULT'

New Zealand are so awful at cricket. Words can't describe how faggyshit every person from New Zealand who isn't Daniel Vettori is at every form of the game. Now they've got awful new jerseys.


What the crap is that even a tangible colour. I thought it inherently impossible that any nation who wasn't Finland could exude such pugnant waves of boringness visibly through matter. I specifically chose a picture of Brendon McCullum too coz Brendon McCullum is the world's greatest wanker. If i walked past him in the street I'd get putrid green wool-laden Tony-Danza scented semen all over my face. Then I'd kick him in the nuts. Look at his big gay face.

"PIERCE BROSNAN IS NOT RELATED TO KEYTARS OR THE BUGGLES IN ANY WAY."

There was an ad about INVISILIFTS at uni. It was the single hottest thing I've ever seen. They advertised that if you got 20 you would get 10 more free and I decided I'd get some then find a way to use them as bargaining chips and result in having massive sweet sex with 15 hot babes. But when I ordered them they thought I was getting them for myself. Hence the quote "are you retarded you need more than 30." It was tits.

"Maybe thrusted is too strong a word. I put my crotch on his face."

"Who here knows Elvis Costello."
"Was he a part of Abbott and Costello?"

What a cardboard character.

Here's another picture for no reason just because I am a thousand words short of my minimum limit.


Man I've never wanted to be Bud Abbott more in my entire life than I do right now.

That's tits.

Disengage says: oooooooo
Disengage says: god ass
Disengage says: ooo
Disengage says: aargh