THIS WEEK WITH GEORGE STEPHANOPOULOS PART 1: THE BOOK OF MEMORY
Nazza told Sam to get his burger on. It is his crowning achievement in life.
The only thing that could possibly usurp such a thing would be winning trivia.
"Ooh nazza is that guy I hate, what an annoying man, i think ill go touch my hair now." - Trivia Bob
Does Trivia Bob even have hair?
I can't remember.
My trivia joke was great. I can't believe it didn't get read out. It was misogynistic and musical, all the requirements of something that succeeds at life.
"Why did the girl break her G-string?...COZ WOMEN CAN'T PLAY THE GUITAR AAAAAHAH"
COMEDY GOLD.
Apparently Levi's voice sounds like a shipyard horn on the phone. Next time I hear a shipyard horn I'm gonna be all 'HO DUDE, LEVI'S AT KOTARA LETS GO'
"Woah the library is talking to me?"
"Is it saying "feed me...i need papers...PAPERS""
Indoor Soccer was pretty sweet this week. We only got beat 15-0 and we got to play against this team that failed at life afterwards coz they didn't show up in time for their game. It was annoying though, my greatest save ever came before the game even started. Leviticus put forth a beautiful curling shot full of venom and ZEST and i acted quickly, moving my exposed genitals (in an unprotected sense not a naked sense) directly into the path of the ball.
"Ok i did not search 'naked bea arthur.' Why is there a picture of her rack."
Hudson was being a douche at trivia. I wanted to stab him in his fat head.
After trivia was great though. I gave everyone judgements of how awesome they were, through the medium of analogizing man as musical album in compact disc form:
Leviticus: "Deluxe Edition box set - full of previously unheard rarities"
Tim Licciardelloton: "Double album across two cds with bonus tracks"
Nazza: "Burnt cd from a friend"
Sam: "Jet's debut album"
"They've raised the Swine flu threat level to phase five."
"Who have?"
"That's right."
And now to close with a print-screened image of some of the latest news headlines. You'll need to click on it.
IT'S A COMEDY OF ERRORS!!!
"I can't stand it" - Sam
I approve of changing the subject of that quote to Trivia Bob. He didn't say it, anyone stupid enough to read this comment, but everything else was spoken.
ReplyDeleteI think Trivia Bob is slightly balding.
That screenshot is the greatest. And it has the Woody Harrelson quote.
Ahaha Bea Arthur. Ahahaha the headline. Ahahah the other headline, about her pooping.