It's not even this week anymore.
And I haven't done my pre-update research.
But I'm gonna be awesome anyway.
THIS WEEK WITH THE ECHOES OF SUPPER WITH GEORGE STEPHANOPOULOS' ASPIC TONGUE PART 2
"Fuck I stabbed myself in the face with my straw."
"Why don't you just use your glass...like Greg Bird"
I just got back from the SYMPHONY. It was great, and gave me a self-satisfied feeling of cultural superiority. What a good fortnight it's been for some of us. Unlike Nazza, he got smashed at trivia. I got smashed last week though, Hudson stole my fuckin wedgevoucher.
I hate Hudson.
I'm gonna stab him in the head.
"Man Jamie Lyon, why don't you just make love to the kicking tee."
Last week was so epic, there's still more to come this long later. I'm so screwing myself here by mentioning that and laying down an obligation to follow through with it so as not to fundamentally disenfranchise my loyal and sizeable readership. Last week has not yet reached it's full conclusion yet, as I am unaware as to whether or not Sam has in fact got his burger on, or indeed ever had it off to begin with. Also apparently you can't imply Bob Dylanness through text.
"Aah i hate that guy" - Ben on Tracy Chapman
For some reason the political world has been far more hilarious than usual this week.
In order of their chronological happening, such highlights have included:
* Malcolm Turnbull comparing Kevin Rudd to Paris Hilton.
* Kevin Rudd doing a dance and eating shit from out of his ear during the budget.
* John Howard pulling an old man Cheney by coming out and spending an entire interview highlighting why he was great and his successors fail at life.
* John Howard's eyebrows.
John Howard said "We're living a quiet life in the 'burbs."
Is that even a word.
Fuck I hate John Howard.
If he was still PM I'd be arrested within seconds of this post because of the nationwide internet sensors detecting my treasonous libel.
Just in case they missed it thought I'll make sure of it now through this pictorial tribute to our most recent leader.
I hate you John Howard.
I had sex with your mother.
Unlike that newsreader. She was awesome. She said "former PM John Howard has slammed the rad government."
The only thing that matches the political awesomeness of recent times is the epicness of my Creative Writing teacher. He likes Blade Runner, and Clockwork Orange, and he quoted a Pink Floyd song in an email.
"Oh my god Bob, NO NO NO!!!" - Creative Writing Teacher's formal critique of a classmate's work.
"Ted Hughes, what's with him, I hate that guy."
In short, Sylvia Plath was a crazy emo bitch, but she was awesome.
And she had an Electra Complex, meaning she probably shat on Ted Hughes' chest.
What a bitch.
"Woah it's Neil Patrick Harris"
"I love Neil Patrick Harris."
"I love him so much."
"He's the greatest man ever."
"He's so great."
"I'm Awesome" - Neil Patrick Harris
"WELL SAID."
